Sunday, October 01, 2006

wood

A recent trend in my Korea life: phalluses. I don't know what it is but all the sudden, everywhere I go, there's a penis involved. I went to Hongdae to meet some friends. Where were they? "Oh, we're at Cocks!" Last weekend I was walking around Hyehwa when I came across, BJ Partners, a hilarious ice cream stand (unfortunately closed when I came back with my camera. I was hoping to catch a couple of Korean girls licking and enjoying long cones topped with vanilla or chocolate fat-free fro-yo). Later, I went to a friend's place for dinner, a girl's nite in with the queens, what were we having? Bangers and Mash. Later in the evening Elinza pointed out the HUGE wooden penis sculpture at the restaurant (레스토랑 resuhtorang) near her apartment. Crazy.


I had one of those returning-of-your-crap-from-my-place exchanges. What did I get as bonus "parting gift" from this ex-lover? A huge pink vibrating dildo (no batteries included=>double dick action). In more exciting news, I got mail. I love mail. I got a package from Mr. O.

What was inside? A banana guard:
Aberrant Designs Inc. is an "idea company" founded by three Canadian Emergency Room Doctors who found themselves extremely concerned about the fruitless amount of banana trauma and abuse taking place in the world. The Banana Guard was conceived and produced to alleviate this problem. We take immense pride in helping to end bruising of the world's most favourite and beloved fruit. You can now take your banana to work school or play secure in the knowledge that no harm will come to it.

Help us protect your banana!



That last line just makes me laugh. Anyway, it looks like a dick. Mr. O knows what I like. Yesterday I received another gift--from Jutta--a cute little Korean relic of sorts, discovered on a walk through Samcheon. She got me a wooden jaji (자지)! There's a nice hole at the top, so I had the intention of getting a piece of cord and wearing it around my neck, you know, to keep it close to my heart. But then Jutta started putting my new dick in funny places, and now I'm not so keen on the idea.

Then, two nights ago I dreamed that I had a penis. A real penis. I was still a woman. I mean I was the same Koco, as I've come to know myself, but looking down at myself, I had a penis. It was just as I guess it would look if I really had one. In my dream reality it was quite normal to me, not surprising or scary. It was just there. Strangely enough, upon waking up, I realized that this was one of the normal parts of the dream. Far worse and disturbing things happened that made me uncomfortable when I was fully conscious. Many people would probaby say it stems from penis envy. Maybe, but I already have so many dicks in my life! I don't know what the deal is, but I guess, if nothing else, it's a good break from being constantly occupied with pussy, breasts, and nipples.

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